Before I Let You Go by Marieke Nijkamp

Kyra is dead. Kyra was Corey’s best friend. Corey will not let Death slip quietly away without answers and Death will not give them up without a fight.

Lost Creek, Alaska is a closed, tight knit community. You either belong or you don’t. Kyra and Corey were born in Lost, grew up together, and were best friends. But things change, businesses folded, times got harder, and Kyra began to have manic episodes. The good people of Lost didn’t just avoid Kyra, they feared her.

So, why after her death were they idolizing her? Her paintings were everywhere but the most disturbing was one of a girl floating under the ice, Kyra herself. Everyone said it was an accident but the painting suggested suicidal thoughts. Why hadn’t someone tried to get her help before she died?

Why hadn’t Corey answered Kyra’s letters more often? They had plans to leave Lost to go out into the world and do things. Kyra saw a therapist and took medication. When she had one of her episodes she painted beautifully, madly, and hated it. Corey wanted to study the stars, Kyra wanted to gather people’s stories, she loved life.

When Corey’s mom got a job outside of Lost, the family moved. Corey promised to keep in touch with Kyra, but the first year of college changed things again. She had room mates and friends that she could openly talk with and do things, so different from life in the closed up town of Lost. More and more, Kyra’s letters got pushed back in a drawer to be read and answered at a later time. Now Corey keeps asking herself why hadn’t she answered Kyra’s letters more often?

Now it was too late.

Everyone said Kyra’s death was inevitable, it was meant to be, that she had even predicted it. Corey didn’t believe any of it, Kyra had promised to wait for her to return to Lost. She hadn’t been there when Kyra needed her now she was determined to find out what happened.

We see Lost and its people through Corey’s eyes but Nijkamp draws the reader in with her words. You feel the cold and isolation of a town that has lost hope for the future and then latches on to a young girl they believe sees a brighter future for them. Corey and Kyra’s story is shared in alternating chapters that carry us back and forth in time. We learn of the girls’ friendship, their dreams of the future, the old spa they would escape to, their attempt to make more of their friendship, and meet some of the town’s people. Most of all you read of the love, disappointment, acceptance, and heartbreak that friendship can bring.

A suspenseful thriller of a mystery that tells the story of friendship, warts and all, from beyond the grave. It also a coming of age story where one girl grows up and the other lives on in memories. In the end, we see that everyone has a side of themselves they keep hidden, sometimes even from their selves.

Format Available: Book, eBook

Review by Katy, Shawnee Branch

 

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